We have all had those moments in life when we wish we could go back just a few seconds to redo, to rewind, to flip back a page or so for multiple reasons.
I suspect that one of the most common reasons is due to that ever present Nemesis of the human spirit that plagues each and every one of us even to the grave ~ that being the cherry red cheeked hotness of embarrassment.
This red flag of the rising warmth of pink cheeks blazed across our face as a result of the exposure of our imagined inner and hidden thoughts and yearnings , or even our physical desires not to mention bodily functions socially deemed to be private if not sacred in some cultures, has been cause for wars, demotions, and literal 'loss of face'.
I will never ever forget the moment when the mother of one of my pre-adolescent crushes said point blank to me, "You like Billy don't you?" I didn't realize that one could be frozen in place and have one's face literally burn until silent tears came to one's eyes all at the same time.
It has happened to us all, this 'unmasking' of our inner beings either as a result of our words, deeds, actions, or inactions being more revealing than we anticipated.
Another time this scarlet dirge become evident in my life was the day that I absentmindedly called my Grade 1 teacher , who was nineteen at the time and male , "Grandma". It happened again when I referred to our Chemistry teacher, a fellow from India, as "Mom" when I raised my hand to answer a question.
I always thought of those little slips of the tongue with a certain amount of humour as I recalled the look of surprise from the recipients.
It wasn't until recently that I came to realize that maybe they didn't mind being called Mom or Grandma because these terms meant that I obviously felt safe and a certain amount of comfort in their presence.
I have an interesting job that involves the supervision of young women living away from home. The other night as I said, "Nightie night. Have a good sleep." to one of the clients, she turned around and said, "I love you too." She turned and gasped as she realized to whom she was talking. She then blushed and quickly covered herself with her blankets.
As I turned off the light and closed her door, I smiled to myself, as I thought that something must be a little right in her life if she can utter such words to a near perfect stranger even par hazard.
It was kind of cool.
I suspect that one of the most common reasons is due to that ever present Nemesis of the human spirit that plagues each and every one of us even to the grave ~ that being the cherry red cheeked hotness of embarrassment.
This red flag of the rising warmth of pink cheeks blazed across our face as a result of the exposure of our imagined inner and hidden thoughts and yearnings , or even our physical desires not to mention bodily functions socially deemed to be private if not sacred in some cultures, has been cause for wars, demotions, and literal 'loss of face'.
I will never ever forget the moment when the mother of one of my pre-adolescent crushes said point blank to me, "You like Billy don't you?" I didn't realize that one could be frozen in place and have one's face literally burn until silent tears came to one's eyes all at the same time.
It has happened to us all, this 'unmasking' of our inner beings either as a result of our words, deeds, actions, or inactions being more revealing than we anticipated.
Another time this scarlet dirge become evident in my life was the day that I absentmindedly called my Grade 1 teacher , who was nineteen at the time and male , "Grandma". It happened again when I referred to our Chemistry teacher, a fellow from India, as "Mom" when I raised my hand to answer a question.
I always thought of those little slips of the tongue with a certain amount of humour as I recalled the look of surprise from the recipients.
It wasn't until recently that I came to realize that maybe they didn't mind being called Mom or Grandma because these terms meant that I obviously felt safe and a certain amount of comfort in their presence.
I have an interesting job that involves the supervision of young women living away from home. The other night as I said, "Nightie night. Have a good sleep." to one of the clients, she turned around and said, "I love you too." She turned and gasped as she realized to whom she was talking. She then blushed and quickly covered herself with her blankets.
As I turned off the light and closed her door, I smiled to myself, as I thought that something must be a little right in her life if she can utter such words to a near perfect stranger even par hazard.
It was kind of cool.
No comments:
Post a Comment