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Saturday, September 27, 2014

Cat Pie

*  Note: Content may offend some.


**  Note: correction...Content will offend some


*** Note: Correction to the Correction...Content will offend several.




My first memory of cats is one that involves the cats in the barn whose job it was to control the ever present mouse population.  The eager presence of these sometimes tame but more often than not semi wild cats was a given whenever it was milking time.  The vision of the spray of milk arcing through the air as scampering  cats ran towards the white and warm liquid as they tried to get as much into their mouths as possible, along with the consequent purr that  accompanied the  licking  and grooming , brings back those  memories of simpler times where man and animals lived in the state of  mutual benefit and understanding. 




Having said that I would now like to draw attention to the fact that not all cat/human interactions have been positive.  Indeed, sometimes the  feline -- homo sapien social intercourse is often  down right dangerous and deadly, with the emphasis on deadly primarily applying to the feline species.


One example of this unfortunate state of being can be illustrated through what has sadly become one of my most troubling lingering memories of   what was  to be our family's joyous traditional Christmas Eve journey to my grandparent's farm home .  As it was  a cold winter night, my dad went out to the garage to start the car so it would be warm for his excited young family.  The garage where the car was parked was about 300 feet from the house.  All the doors and windows were of course closed due to the cold weather.   Suddenly there was the most high pitched unforgettably haunting screech that lasted for less than 10 seconds coming from the direction of the garage  Fearing that something horrible had happened to my father, we rushed to the door and called out in concern.  Dad came to the garage door looking pal and shaken.  A cat had apparently crawled up under the hood of the car to nestle in beside the warm radiator and probably had fallen to sleep. Sadly and memorably it was still there when Dad turned the ignition and the fan on the now broken radiator had started to turn.   


Another example of how quick and tenuous is that of the life of felines when they coexist with people, however brief, has recently been shared with me and I shall now share  this tale of catastrophe with you.


A couple were driving along on a rural road one afternoon.  The gravelled road was lined with taller grasses. As the road was well graded   the vehicle was traveling at a steady speed when suddenly a cat darted out from the long grass and the inevitable sickening 'thud' was heard and  inevitably felt as the car tires traveled over delicate bones and flesh. Miraculously a cat was seen in the rear view mirror slinking slowly into the ditch.
   The brake pedal  was slammed and the vehicle  came to a sudden halt.  Driver and passenger looked at each other in horror at what had just transpired.  


Being the humane people that they were, they decided to get out of the car and go back and search for the victim, as they feared that no animal could survive such an encounter. The thought that they had been the cause of any animal lying suffering and alone weighed heavily on their minds.  After a short search of the area they found what they had feared--a lone cat lying flat on the ground obviously in pain as it hissed and clawed the air .  The driver of the car ran back  to the vehicle and quickly brought out a shovel from the trunk, prepared to do what 'had to be done'. He  proceeded to hit the cat on the head  in order to shorten the  poor animal's pain and suffering  This was not an easy task as it took several hits before the cat's  crazed and anguished cries were finally mercifully silenced.


The two people returned to their vehicle and continued on their journey trying to shake the gory scene from their mind's eye while at the same time assuring each other that they had indeed done the right thing.


 Upon reaching their destination and while getting out of the car  the passenger heard something strange coming from the underside of the vehicle. 


After  leaning down and peering under,  the pale faced passenger called out to the driver:  "  Hey...there is a  bloodied cat caught up around the frame."  




Lesson of the Day:  Sometimes you are the Cat, and sometimes you are the Pie, and sometimes you  are the Cat in the Pie.



Thursday, September 4, 2014

Campground Adventures in a Technical World

It used to be that when a guy disappears with canoe and camper for ten days he would have done just that . 


 There would be no communication to the those who   stayed back; no  possibility that photos or adventure  would be shared ; no exchange of niceties until the grand homecoming that could only be guessed at in terms of  exact time and date.  


With the advent of  new technology and the yen to 'keep up' with modern trends, those days of total unplugging on the part of this family's fisherman has pretty much ended.


I say   pretty much ended because just because one puts a texting device in the hands of an individual does not mean that communication is automatically the  result of the texting experience. 


 In actuality it can become more of an exercise in reading than writing, employing the use of contextual, syntax, and word configuration clues along with the never ending question on the part of the reader , "Just what the H.... is he talking about?"


Some examples to prove this point.


Very gonning


Sokis, mac salad no luck fishing


Got sun rain sheter


Owls hottun


Very gonning firhing


Fursns is on


Gjawmj mj asj mg  


Have to chrach phonie


Hi had know sereve


Playing majgog


Ok having samno


At camp saw flon chop taters


Noting so far


Haas a good thing


Very gonning


Eat preogies saugeg


Having coffee then firshing


I love you eggs then to flon


2 fish over 75 center meters




I was able to decipher most through the time of day and from my own questions .


Can anyone guess which one probably means


 "I have my jammies on?"



















My most favourite camper and fisherman in the world has entered into the era of high tech communication armed with unlimited texting on his cell phone .