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Sunday, March 25, 2012

Smokin'

Although I couldn't describe myself as a 'smoker' until I was at least 19, I can say that I had had some adventures with smoking and cigarettes on a semi  regular occurrence during my preadolescence years.

I am not quite sure when I was first introduced to smoking cigarettes.  I was probably around 4 or 5  I suppose.    It  probably occurred when our family would visit our neighbours across the field.  It was a household of at least 5 bachelors  and their mother.  My sister and I always basked in the attention we received from these wonderful uncles who would carry us around, lift us high into the air, tease us with funny faces...and let us puff on a cigarette whenever they thought mom wasn't watching.  These would be the traditional 'roll your owns"...soggy ends, no filter, and ashes dropping at every turn. 

.  Now, just because a person says they smoked does not necessarily mean they always smoked tobacco,  nor does that suggest that they smoked anything illegal. It simply means they smoked..and in my case during my sixth year at school it meant that I smoked  pencil shavings.  This lesson in "just because something looks like something does not mean that that something tastes or  smells like it looks"  is still burnt into my memory and my throat.

  The actual buying  of cigarettes was a rare occurrence for this rural child who did not receive a regular allowance , so when  the opportunity arose to buy a ready made pack while visiting a town friend  for a sleep over, it  did not go wasted.  After we purchased a pack of MacDonald's  (.42 cents)  from the local gas station, we walked out  to a grove of trees in the middle of a cultivated field  on the edge of town, and proceeded to smoke  all 25  of the perfect filtered tubes in one afternoon.    The delirium and nausea which plagued us during the night caused only minor concern on the part of my friend's mother who thought we had both caught the flu at the same time.

 Besides the act of  'pressure smoking' to avoid the risk of being caught with the contraband in hand, a child who wants to smoke must oft times resort to out and out thievery.  The same child who would never think of taking money from their mother's purse or rifle through their teacher's possessions will, from personal experience, steal a cigarette or two from their mother's cigarette drawer while she is  napping, or even daringly sneak into the teacher's car during noon hour to pick out a few sticks from the pack so invitingly sitting on the driver's seat.

A smoking child does not only have to contend with the moral decay  caused by sly and  devious  thievery as well as the obvious health concerns. This child must also cope with the most basic of all human emotions; which is  the thrill of the  gripping  fear of getting caught.  We , the smokers in the school, would watch carefully as the teacher would go for his recess smoke break in his car.  We would sit still, wondering quietly, eyes locked, breath abated,  if he would "notice". 

 I would lie awake nights listening for mom opening the cupboard door where she kept her carton of cigarettes fully expecting her to realize  that one package of her duMaurier's had simply vanished.  It was  indeed a time of adrenalin and stress that is probably not unlike that  experienced by any thief or embezzler.

The epitome of this stress occurred one  spring evening after a friend had visited for the afternoon. We had taken our stash of cigarettes out to the edge of the road allowance, and after having braved the threat of snakes, thorny rose bushes, and scraped knees we hunkered down beside a stone pile and proceeded to enjoy our ill gotten cigarettes.  

 It was around 8pm later that evening.  Twilight was setting in.  I was upstairs in my room.    I could hear Mom walking around downstairs.  I could hear the voice of our hired man call out.  I heard water being poured into pails. I heard the truck start up.  I looked out the window to see what was up. 

 The stone pile was on FIRE!



Now , I won't say that I was a religious child, rarely having been taken to Sunday School, but I can say that it was pretty much then and there that I decided to 'go clean and straight' that very moment.  I don't believe I smoked another cigarette until I was 19. I can  also assure you that I bought almost every cigarette I smoked from my own money until I quit the habit 10 years ago.

I can only imagine the rigour of the religious experience that must have occurred in the hearts of the youngsters mentioned in the  attached link.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2113802/Kosice-Slovakia-Children-burn-14th-century-castle-cigarette.html

Player's, Black Cat, Alpine, Macdonald's, Sweet Caproal, Peter Jackson's,
                        Alpine, duMaurier, Macdonald's Menthol 


If you can think of other brands, please list them in the comments.

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