During the last couple of months I have had the dubious opportunity to require the services of a physiotherapist. Before this I had never given much thought as to what these people did. How bad could it be? I thought perhaps they rubbed your muscles , or wiggled your arms, or crinked your neck. Nope. That's not what they do at all, at all, at all.
What they do is make you WORK! You are made to work your muscles to the brink of tears and exhaustion while they calmly stand beside you , arms crossed, leaning against the wall, as they watch. They watch how hard you are pulling, bending, stretching and grimacing. Then, after all that, they invite you into their 'little room' where you are told to lie facedown on the cot that has what I refer to as a "screaming hole". Its that little space you put your face into because if it wasn't there your face would be smacked down flat and the scream drool would have no where to go and it would be messy.
You follow their directions merely and primarily because some government agency is paying your way to be there. So you have to show up, sweat up, lie down, and floor scream not so softly into that modern day scream catcher.
And THEN, the physioperson grabs the injured body part (in my case the leg)and proceeds to bend it backward. Like really backward. Like so backward the only thing louder than the popping and cracking going on inside the joint are the gasps and groans being thrown literally to the floor through that little hole of pain.
Now physioperson says, "Feel THAT Penny?" Or, as physioperson starts actually leaning their body weight down lower and lower upon my bent and suffering limb, "How about this?"
I did not KNOW that is what physiotherpests do and I told them that one day. The reply was , "Just because it hurts doesn't mean it harms."---
--and THUS starts the purpose of this blog....
I like to think that that phrase , "Just because it hurts doesn't mean it harms" can also be applied to concepts surrounding relationships.
We most assurdely all hurt, have hurt, been hurt, and will be hurt. We all will be guilty of hurting our peers, our loved ones, our children,our parents, and strangers.
And sometimes there is harm that follows the hurt. Harm that fractures lives and makes a wound that festers and scars both the one who caused the hurt and the recipient, as well as whoever may be in the vicinity physically or emotionally to witness the hurtful act.
The hurt may and most times does come from an outside source, but it is the harm that results is what comes from within. We can go to doctors and physiotherpists if it is a physical hurt, or we can see counsellors and psychologists for an emotional hurt. But no matter what those people tell us, it is still ultimately up to us to do the work..of exercising or in the case of hurts that are other than physical taking the time to adjust our thinking. Part of this adjusted thinking will inevitably lead to having to repeatedly forgive just as much as a daily ritual of stretching and bending is for a physical hurt.
People often have a hard time forgiving because of the genuine feelings of hurt that occur,just as it is in the case of the pain that comes with a physical injury and required painful exercise to follow. But if one doesn't forgive and do that exercise of learning to let go, accept, and trust , the harmful effects of fear,isolation , and anger will start to harden one's heart until other parts of one's life become affected. Relationships get cut off, bitterness sets in, and innocent people start getting hurt which in turns creates even more harm. This will happen just as assuredly as if one didn't exercise a damaged ligament; the rest of one's joints would bare too much pressure and get damaged in the long run creating further injury and hurt which,again, if not cared for becomes permanent harm.
There is a reason for that little hole in the scream table--it is to help the one who is hurting to cope with a painful situation. May we all find our own little scream table in life so that when we hurt we have someone or somewhere to go to help us stop the harm.
Hurt -- inevitable.
Harm -- optional.
Forgiveness -- mandatory.
What they do is make you WORK! You are made to work your muscles to the brink of tears and exhaustion while they calmly stand beside you , arms crossed, leaning against the wall, as they watch. They watch how hard you are pulling, bending, stretching and grimacing. Then, after all that, they invite you into their 'little room' where you are told to lie facedown on the cot that has what I refer to as a "screaming hole". Its that little space you put your face into because if it wasn't there your face would be smacked down flat and the scream drool would have no where to go and it would be messy.
You follow their directions merely and primarily because some government agency is paying your way to be there. So you have to show up, sweat up, lie down, and floor scream not so softly into that modern day scream catcher.
And THEN, the physioperson grabs the injured body part (in my case the leg)and proceeds to bend it backward. Like really backward. Like so backward the only thing louder than the popping and cracking going on inside the joint are the gasps and groans being thrown literally to the floor through that little hole of pain.
Now physioperson says, "Feel THAT Penny?" Or, as physioperson starts actually leaning their body weight down lower and lower upon my bent and suffering limb, "How about this?"
I did not KNOW that is what physiotherpests do and I told them that one day. The reply was , "Just because it hurts doesn't mean it harms."---
--and THUS starts the purpose of this blog....
I like to think that that phrase , "Just because it hurts doesn't mean it harms" can also be applied to concepts surrounding relationships.
We most assurdely all hurt, have hurt, been hurt, and will be hurt. We all will be guilty of hurting our peers, our loved ones, our children,our parents, and strangers.
We can be hurt in several ways:verbally,physically,sexually,emotionally, and morally. I could stop there and say, "That's that. You are, were and, will be hurt..so suck it up princess and get on with life." Sometimes we do that very thing and sometimes we don't follow such advice either because we won't or can't, but mostly because in the long run it doesn't work.
And sometimes there is harm that follows the hurt. Harm that fractures lives and makes a wound that festers and scars both the one who caused the hurt and the recipient, as well as whoever may be in the vicinity physically or emotionally to witness the hurtful act.
The hurt may and most times does come from an outside source, but it is the harm that results is what comes from within. We can go to doctors and physiotherpists if it is a physical hurt, or we can see counsellors and psychologists for an emotional hurt. But no matter what those people tell us, it is still ultimately up to us to do the work..of exercising or in the case of hurts that are other than physical taking the time to adjust our thinking. Part of this adjusted thinking will inevitably lead to having to repeatedly forgive just as much as a daily ritual of stretching and bending is for a physical hurt.
People often have a hard time forgiving because of the genuine feelings of hurt that occur,just as it is in the case of the pain that comes with a physical injury and required painful exercise to follow. But if one doesn't forgive and do that exercise of learning to let go, accept, and trust , the harmful effects of fear,isolation , and anger will start to harden one's heart until other parts of one's life become affected. Relationships get cut off, bitterness sets in, and innocent people start getting hurt which in turns creates even more harm. This will happen just as assuredly as if one didn't exercise a damaged ligament; the rest of one's joints would bare too much pressure and get damaged in the long run creating further injury and hurt which,again, if not cared for becomes permanent harm.
Hurt -- inevitable.
Harm -- optional.
Forgiveness -- mandatory.
No comments:
Post a Comment