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Taste Testing

 Last night I was driving alongside a field of several moving combines (I believe I could make out about five).  As their  lights shone and twirled in a whirl of dust it put me in mind  of a sort of Harvest Hoedown.  Pulleys twirling and cutters and headers moving in an exotic rhythm as  dust and insects became  momentarily visible only to disappear suddenly as  the machine quickly turned inwards and sashayed in another direction.


  Along with this Harvest Polka ,  I noticed  that two  park lights of what appeared to be a small truck sitting on one side at the edge of the field were on and the vehicle wasn't moving.

  I recognized the reasoning behind this scene immediately,  then thought to myself that over the last 40 years some things never change.

 It probably still is a bad thing to drive over an unharvested grain swath with any type of vehicle --even a bike.

It probably still is a good idea to have the back chute closed before filling the truck box up with grain, rather than driving back to the house with a full load leaving a little tell tale trail behind.

I'd even bet it is still a bad idea to mess with the mirrors of any type of grain truck for at least the next six weeks.  This bad idea also can cover the risk one takes by moving any oddly placed boards, flags, or pails near the hopper and auger where grain trucks back up to unload.

Even with the common use of hopper bottom bins it seems to me that it still isn't a good idea to leave  rarely used wooden bin door slats inside the bin and proceed to auger grain on top.  Children can learn many many new swear words with the breaking of this rule.

Books in a grain truck are OK as long as one doesn't see the full combine having to wind it's way over to the truck from the other side of the field because there has been 'reading going on" instead of paying attention. I use the term 'wind' as combiners will never break the 'Do Not Drive on the Swath Rule'.


I KNOW this one is still in effect:  One must never ever lean over the twirling power take off  which is situated under the lifted truck box to pull the hoist lever to tilt the full box even higher.  You will get yelled at a lot if you do this...I know.  This rule is a real biggie right along with knowing which is the diesel fuel tank and the purple gas tank if you are the Gas Gopher for the season.

And finally, I'd bet some Serious Coin that there are at least a few farmers who still think the best way to test the fitness or grade  of the wheat is to grab a handful of grain from truck as it flows from the chute to the auger and, after a careful look at  the general colour and shape of each kernel in their open palm (while flicking away the odd beetle or grasshopper), raise it up to their mouth and stick their tongue out to pick up some of the golden coloured grain in order to give it the chew test which analyses the hardness and texture.  These taste test predictions, it was thought, helped the farmer decide whether to wait a day or so before finishing a field or to surge on ahead into the wee hours of the morning as long as the dew stayed away.

Now getting back to the park lights on in the parked half-ton. 

How else are you going to find your mode of transportation back to your home/bed on a moonless night at 2:30 am after the barley finally gets tough as  there are no landmarks or bushes left on the rock pile free, mostly level prairie grain field? 


 

Ready to Eat!

Yes it is harvest time on the prairies !

 These are the times when lights traveling across the field in long angled trails, sometimes twirling, sometimes seeming to magically   multiply as combines, tractors, and trucks join together only to part again and continue on to  travel on imaginary highways avoiding sloughs and rocks, while  momentarily disappearing behind softly rising hills and dips on the prairie landscape.

These are the days when tomato sandwiches and mayonnaise taste the best.  Purple plums eaten with hands that have handled the hose of diesel fuel, messed with greasy pulleys,  and  probably swept out at least one mouse nest  from the grain truck have a flavour and savouriness not found anywhere else on the planet. 

Yes, harvest meals are truly a unique experience and  are  almost  a welcome challenge to the meal makers as they prepare, pack, and transport meals to the harvest field.  Pots full of mashed potatoes, roasters of fried chicken, casseroles of hot buttered corn, along with a fresh pie or two are only a small example of the nutritious fare travelled out to the back forty; packed in newspapers in cardboard boxes, along with 'real' dishes and metal utensils...all in accordance with  that  heretofore little known by urbanites harvest meal law  that  somewhere on some grain box is sketched out in a combination of axle grease and barely dust:

  Items such as cold Cheese Whiz sandwiches on white bread, canned fruit, and bags of potato chips are NEVER EVER to be disguised as a meal for a Harvesting Prairie Farmer.

 Alas,there was once a time when I, as a mother of two preschoolers, married to a then farmer who was 'out combining in his field'  mistakenly and yes ,  brazenly, thought that this above previously unproven agriculturally based law could be broken.

I thought of this because I was tired, busy, and wanted to cut corners...soooooo...I went to the nearby rural general store and purchased some bottles of Coke, a bag of Doritos,  a few chocolate bars, and some garlic sausage and proceeded to travel fifteen miles out to the field, with the children strapped in their seats, over gravel and dirt  roads  until I finally reached the approach closest to where the combine and  more importantly my combiner was busily traveling around and around on the field.

  I remember distinctly that it was an almost festive time.  The children played in the dusty stubble as my husband sat in the car eating Doritos and hunks of sausage listening to the sound of grasshoppers and children laughing. All too soon it was time to pack up paper and wrappers when alas, alas, alas, as I picked up the plastic label that had once protected the garlic sausage I saw these words:

This is a RAW meat product.  Do not consume until it is fully cooked.

The  truth of  the Harvest Law of  the Meal had made itself evident.

For the last 30 years I have always always checked for this sign whenever I purchase over the counter meat products.

Trailer Boat Innovation

 

 

 

 

 1. Note the position of boat in relation to shoreline. 

 

 

 

2. Back trailer up close enough to hook up winch rope.

 

3. Hook up rope.

 

 

4. Begin winching as boat rolls along easily on extra extended tire surface.

 

 

 

5. Boat on trailer in less than 2 minutes.



 
 
 

 

 

 

With this little extra device, the trailer only has to be in the minimum amount of water to allow the boat to be rolled off quickly and easily.

 

Fishing/ Camping Rules

Fishing/Camping Rules:


1. Get a Fishing License.

2. Get a Boat Driving License.

3. Read  and know about the  catch limits for your area.

4. Do not leave your 28' motor home and boat trailer parked at the boat launch while you go out on the lake to fish, as other people may  need the launch to  get in and off the water.

5.  If your garbage flies out of your boat, make at least some small attempt at retrieving it instead of just letting it drift away.

6.  When changing your fish line, pick up the old line and take it home and put it in YOUR garbage instead of just leaving it on the ground.

7.  When starting up your generator, it would be polite to talk to  your campground neighbours informing them of how long you think you will be needing to disrupt their peace and quiet and opportunity to listen to wild life in nature.  Do NOT ever run the generator longer than three hours and try to do so at noon when mechanical noises are not so noticeable in the wild.  If you find that you need to run the generator longer than three hours perhaps you should either a) get a bigger battery b) go to an electrified campsite c) stay home.

8.  Do not use your fish net as an oar.  It just doesn't work very well.

9.  It is always BEST to check to see if you have a bung in your boat and that it is inserted correctly before you launch it.  In fact, it is strongly suggested that one check this before leaving home  recalling this ancient fisherman's motto "Do you know where your Bung is?"

10. Turning your hitch at right angles as you unload your boat from the trailer is never a good thing. It is unnatural for other boaters to  be able see the floor of your boat from the middle of the lake.

11.  (a)Trying to start your boat motor with it tilted UP will only result in much frustration on your part--not to mention the motor itself by overheating and sputtering. Carburetors  like being level.

       (b) Further addressing the topic of difficult to start motors, in the event that any difficult to start boat motor does indeed start, it is not a recommended fishing practice to head out immediately to the furthest  and most isolated side of the lake. 

12.  Please do not try to hide the fact that you are the type of fisherman that keeps every single fish no matter the type or how large or small.   When you stand on the other side of your truck discreetly 'cleaning, cleaning' for an hour...we all pretty much know you have TOO many fish; and we for sure know it when you come back the next day and do the same thing.

13.  If you have a boat without a steering wheel, one should sit on the right hand side of the motor...to counteract the spinning of the propeller.  It keeps the boat leveller and makes the steering easier.

14.  Throwing hooks into the water when you don't catch a fish does not really reap you anything but a possible pulled shoulder and a bigger bill next time you go to the fishing tackle place.

15. There are no family secrets when fishing and camping in public.  One can pretty much ascertain what some people's wives and children have to deal with when one hears  swearing, banging, scraping, while watching the  zero to sixty attitude towards other fisherman with regard as to where they park their trailers.  (Threatening to flatten tires really isn't part of very many effective conflict resolution methodologies and probably should be avoided.)

16.  Finally and most importantly, lifejackets are to be worn.

Until next year.

  May your waters be calm, and your boat keep you dry

That little one you threw back may become next year's

 Big Guy.