Gratitude must be greater whenever a gift is not only freely given but also given when it is needed--p.hoffman
Most of the snow has melted and that which hasn't has a nice crust on it so if a wind comes up there won't be any drifting. The frost is still in the road bed so country grids are still firm and pretty much rut free.
This would have been the type of evening my mother would announce after the supper dishes were done and the floor swept, "I am going to Sophie's for coffee. Do not phone me unless someone breaks their leg or the house is on fire." That would be the last we four children would see of her until the next morning a breakfast.
When I was a single woman living alone in the town where I taught school , 4 or 5 mothers from the community would periodically show up on my doorstep for coffee. They would arrive around 7:00 pm and often not go home until after ll:00 pm...laughing as they left that it was I that would have to see their children at school the next day.
I was of course flattered that these ladies had chosen my humble abode to spend their time .
I should have caught on when one of these visitors would invariably comment, "Oh it's so quiet here." which would be followed by a knowing laughter from the other 4 women in attendance.
Another clue should have been by the hush that fell upon the group like a grey and dusty army blanket when the phone rang. The conversation would only resume until after it was determined that the caller was not any of my visitor's family members.
Of course, now after having given birth to 4 children , it has become clear to me what these mothers' motives for visiting were. Where else in town would these women be safe from telephone calls and child interruptions? What child was actually going to phone the teacher's number to ask to speak to their mother because of some minor mishap?
My house was the most child proof structure without a legal age restriction in the whole town. I was, in fact, these women's needed Coffee Out Friend.
I was fortunate to find my own Coffee Out Friend quite early on in my child rearing years. Those evenings when I got into the car, alone, and drove those five relatively quiet miles on gravel roads to her farmhouse are vivid and treasured.
The talk about recipes, gardens , and grocery sales while drinking coffee and eating pieces of cake that I hadn't made myself, are as an integral part of my memories of raising a family as are Christmas Concerts, Band Recitals, Science Fairs, and Skating Lessons. My Coffee Out Friend's hospitality and the periodic sanctuary of her house were every bit as important to the raising of my family as were my childrens' teachers, coaches, and doctors.
My Coffee Out Friend has long since moved to the city. I would have loved to have gone to see her at her farmhouse this evening . I don't need her the same way anymore..... but I miss her. I suppose I miss her just like I miss the reasons why I had needed her in the first place.
The important thing is that when I needed her I had her.
Most of the snow has melted and that which hasn't has a nice crust on it so if a wind comes up there won't be any drifting. The frost is still in the road bed so country grids are still firm and pretty much rut free.
This would have been the type of evening my mother would announce after the supper dishes were done and the floor swept, "I am going to Sophie's for coffee. Do not phone me unless someone breaks their leg or the house is on fire." That would be the last we four children would see of her until the next morning a breakfast.
When I was a single woman living alone in the town where I taught school , 4 or 5 mothers from the community would periodically show up on my doorstep for coffee. They would arrive around 7:00 pm and often not go home until after ll:00 pm...laughing as they left that it was I that would have to see their children at school the next day.
I was of course flattered that these ladies had chosen my humble abode to spend their time .
I should have caught on when one of these visitors would invariably comment, "Oh it's so quiet here." which would be followed by a knowing laughter from the other 4 women in attendance.
Another clue should have been by the hush that fell upon the group like a grey and dusty army blanket when the phone rang. The conversation would only resume until after it was determined that the caller was not any of my visitor's family members.
Of course, now after having given birth to 4 children , it has become clear to me what these mothers' motives for visiting were. Where else in town would these women be safe from telephone calls and child interruptions? What child was actually going to phone the teacher's number to ask to speak to their mother because of some minor mishap?
My house was the most child proof structure without a legal age restriction in the whole town. I was, in fact, these women's needed Coffee Out Friend.
I was fortunate to find my own Coffee Out Friend quite early on in my child rearing years. Those evenings when I got into the car, alone, and drove those five relatively quiet miles on gravel roads to her farmhouse are vivid and treasured.
The talk about recipes, gardens , and grocery sales while drinking coffee and eating pieces of cake that I hadn't made myself, are as an integral part of my memories of raising a family as are Christmas Concerts, Band Recitals, Science Fairs, and Skating Lessons. My Coffee Out Friend's hospitality and the periodic sanctuary of her house were every bit as important to the raising of my family as were my childrens' teachers, coaches, and doctors.
My Coffee Out Friend has long since moved to the city. I would have loved to have gone to see her at her farmhouse this evening . I don't need her the same way anymore..... but I miss her. I suppose I miss her just like I miss the reasons why I had needed her in the first place.
The important thing is that when I needed her I had her.
No comments:
Post a Comment